Guys find me intimidating
Guys find me intimidating - dating fender bass serial number
But I’m hoping that it isn’t a delusional myth to assume that sometimes a guy leaves a girl not because she isn’t awesome, but rather because she is awesome and that scares him.
Sadly, I find myself in this situation a little too often, so by now I’ve got a system for dealing with my hurt feelings and bruised ego in the immediate wake of being rejected.
Until recently, that is, since I’ve started to notice an alarming trend: In three of my last four rejections, I concluded that the guy ended things with me because I intimidated him.
I call this trend “alarming” because I usually consider it delusional to blame a guy’s lack of interest on intimidation. ” is a phrase that I’ve always thought of as the battle cry for cheesy, brainless girls who are totally lacking in any charming or marketable attributes whatsoever.
You know, the kinds of girls who think they’re coming across as totally hot and athletic when they post a Facebook status update about going to the gym, notwithstanding the fact that they’re 15 pounds overweight and probably consumed more calories in Smart Water than they burned on the elliptical (while flipping through the pages of magazine, of course).
The type who is practically the poster child for He’s Just Not That Into You used to seem to me to be the most likely to over- and misuse the excuse of intimidation when consoling herself in the face of heartbreak.
So, being a woman who used to mold and fold herself to meet society’s standards of “the girl he wants to date,” I started Googling to see exactly what men found intimidating in a woman, all in an effort to fix it in myself.
The answers I found were actually super enraging — especially on one particular Reddit post I’d stumbled across.
Some answered, “If she’s better looking than me,” while others brought up words like “smarter,” “stronger,” “funnier,” and “outspoken.” Women who made more money than their male counterparts, or had a better job or seemed more successful in general, were also penalized.
Basically, it seemed to me that if a woman is better than a man she’s dating in any aspect of her life, she’s automatically cast as “too intimidating.”I was immediately pissed, because a lot of the characteristics that men evidently considered intimidating were fundamental parts of me.
At first, I agreed and took this as a compliment because they told me it was a very attractive quality to have. I questioned the guy who told me this and asked him to elaborate. I never want to be something I'm not, and neither should anyone else.
But then something that one guy said to me made me think: I'm confident, but this confidence can apparently be intimidating. He told me that there was nothing wrong with my confidence of course, but that sometimes guys might find this confidence intimidating because I was so sure of myself as a person, and not many guys know how to react to that kind of girl. And no one else should try to change someone else just because they're "intimidated" by them.
In my college years, I've personally made friends more with guys than girls and due to this, I've realized a lot of new things about myself that my girlfriends wouldn't have told me.